I sit down to write this amongst dirty socks, empty sippy cups, packages of wipes, and scattered art supplies. Amongst the rubble there are stuffed animals, board books, a nursing pillow, spoons that once held chocolate avocado mouse, and my Babywise book. To my right is a small pile of Owen's dirty clothes. To my left, a wet towel that once held a wiggly, lavender-scented baby and Stuart's tennis shoes.
Life. Has gotten. Messier.
And not just literally.
In general, switching from having just Georgia to now having Georgia and Owen has been a smooth transition. Sure, it's still a little hairy and exhausting at moments, but for the most part it's been very good.
Except those middle of the night feedings. I'll be realllly glad when those are over. Girlfriend likes her sleep.
But learning to accept this newly-created messiness is just part of life at this moment.
While Skyping with my parents, I now either have a nursing baby latched on or both a nursing baby and a toddler scrambling around on my lap (half squishing her nursing brother in the process).
And both usually have poopy diapers.
While cooking dinner, I have a sweet little girl who wants to help and will drag her stool in from the hallway to participate. If she isn't doing that, she's pulling dirty dishes out of the dishwasher, asking for a snack, or tugging on my apron strings. Which is cute for about five seconds. Dinner preparation also requires a nursing break, which usually lasts for about forty five minutes (conveniently just enough time for me to loose momentum and want to fall asleep in the chair).
Bless Stuart's heart. He's really uped his game in the dishes department. Because as soon as we're done with dinner, it's Georgia's bathtime…which then leads to Owen's feeding time…which then leads to Georgia's bedtime…which then leads to Owen's bathtime…I'm sure you all know how this goes.
I am so thankful for a husband that will joyfully pitch in and scrub the crusted turkey pan and seventeen sippy cup lids for me.
The fact of the matter is simply this – life is just messy.
While reading through Georgia's Storybook Bible tonight before bed, I read her the story of Adam and Eve. It's amazing – here we are as humans thousands of years later still very affected by Adam and Eve's original sin in the Garden.
Children are disobedient and rebellious. Parents are selfish and quick to anger.
Laundry gets stained. Houses get dirty.
We loose our tempers.
The great news is that God doesn't just leave us here. He doesn't just leave us to fend for ourselves with crazy children and a filthy house. He gives us grace. He gives us energy. He gives us strength. He gave us Christ.
He also gives us a sense of humor to be able to sit back and laugh in those overwhelming moments. After all, this life isn't the end of it. And one day we will rejoice in a kingdom that never needs to be cleaned! In robes that will never need to be washed! With hearts that are pure and joyous always!
I don't know about you, but I look forward to that day.
Even while looking forward to Heaven, it's so wonderful to be humbled and tested here on earth. Yes, you heard me, I said it's wonderful.
These messy trials we face day in and day out in our homes sanctify us. They keep us on our knees in prayer. And that is where we always should be.
It's not about our comfort. It's about God being glorified in the process.
And, pardon the phrase, but I'm really trying to learn to keep my panties out of a wad. It's in my nature to want things to be perfectly clean and organized at all times – I like having my fridge clean and stocked, my laundry folded and put away, my babies clean and well-mannered. Ha. But that ain't life. Especially at this moment.
Taking the time to play with my babies IS life at this moment.
Establishing a new “Sunday Night Family Movie” tradition, even if that means completely ignoring the tragic state of the house, is life.
Georgia learning the word “Mine!” is life. Dangit.
Building a bonfire in our driveway just so we can hang out together unplugged and get dirty is life.
Changing four poopy diapers in five minutes (literally, people) is life.
Still mourning the loss of my sweet dog Caliber is life.
Staring at chunks of squished Playdo on my floor is life.
Forgetting to pay the garbage bill on time because I've completely lost track of my days and months is life.
In this very moment, life is overwhelming. And blessed. And joyful. And dirty. And sweet.
And did I mention dirty?
I'd like to say that I'm going to straighten this all up. But I'm not. At least I'm going to try and not. I'm going to try and learn to savor the chaos of the moment, go to sleep, and arise to a new day full of new grace, and dishes, tomorrow.